So now that I have a kid, I can no longer take a trip to the mall lightly. There needs to be preparation... bags packed, emergency diapers, receiving blankets, food for me, food for baby...it is a big hot mess. So I still can’t figure out what made me think that a trip to Barrie was a good idea at 5:30 pm last Wednesday night.
First issue...the time...This is when Finn is most fickle and it takes just the slightest mis-step to annoy him...so when he started screaming louder then I have ever heard him on the way there, I should have turned around. Second issue...lack of preparation means I forgot something important...receiving blankets...shit...Again, I don’t know why I didn’t turn around...I was just determined to not be ruled by my kid - I wanted to get to that stupid mall and shop god dammit!
Ok, so it started with the scream, then he tired himself out so much he fell asleep...bonus...but then he awoke right when we got to babies r us...yay. He was pretty good in this store, but I developed quite the arm strain carrying the stupid car seat around as it now weighs 10 tonnes (or so it feels like). There must be some super technology that someone can develop to make these items less bulky, but I digress...I guess finding a cure for penile malfunction is more important...
On my way out to the car I noticed some jack ass parked so close to me I couldn’t get Finn into his docking station so I had to covertly place him beside me in the front while I drove to another parking spot that gave me more room. Did I mention it is blizzard-y outside? Oh, ok that paints a prettier picture.
When we get to the mall I went directly to the mommy area to feed him, which I did, and which he then proceeded to barf all over me. No biggie I’ll grab a blankie...opps forgot them...I guess stiff paper towels will have to do.
Next we headed to the gap while Finn was blissfully full, so I figured I could get some clothes shopping in. Nope...he decides to empty his bowels instead. So I grabbed some jeans and hightailed it to the change room where I balanced Finn on a bench to wipe poop off his ass. All clean, but now Mr. Miserable will NOT go back in his car seat. I succumb to the crying and lay him on my coat on the floor of the gap...not winning mommy of the year here am I?
He then proceeds to poop two more times, during the corse of our stay in the gap I get to place all these stinky diapers in my purse for safe keeping...yay. Upon leaving the store he still won’t get into the car seat so I have to then carry him around with one arm while I push the stroller with the other and maneuver throughout the stores without killing anyone.
So when I finally conceded to take him home it was past his bedtime, I still haven’t eaten supper and I am so tired I can barely shuffle. I get home and warm up his dinner and start the bedtime routine only to have him decide he will not go to sleep, so I spent the next 2.5 hours going up and down the stairs, rocking him to sleep when finally at 11 pm I decide to let him cry it out while I inhale my lovely gourmet dinner of cheerios. By 11:30 I am in bed wondering what the hell I was thinking and decide to never leave the house again...
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